Ghosted on Baby Tinder

by Abigail Stanley

So a few of you might have seen the sponsored posts on social media about mum's groups or mum's focused social media online. I joined Mush when I had my second baby Minnie as I had anxiety and PPD with my first baby, Teddy, and felt I wanted to get out and about more and make some new friends when I had my second. 

Funnily enough, my next-door neighbour had a baby girl three days after I had mine. When I downloaded the app she was there on nearby mums. I avoided it, I couldn't do it! I had recently had my hair done by our opposite neighbour and hated it and had to go elsewhere so I have a life now of constantly wearing hats in the garden and avoiding her like the plague. I didn't want to risk another neighbour aversion situation so it just felt a bit close to home. 

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I saw some other mums that were in the town I lived in who had put their requirements for meetups and chats, playdates etc. Great! Like-minded mums, I'll probably have a chat for a few days and then meet up at a play gym. Standard baby first date place, think Nandos but for baby meetups. 

I messaged about five mums over about five months. Towards the latter half, I was becoming that cheesy guy that sends you a jokey desperate opening line. I think I put something like 'oh hi, I was beginning to think there weren't any babies in this town, what brings you to baby tinder (sticky out tongue emoji)". Kill me now. I threw my phone across the room out of sheer embarrassment. 

A few mums messaged back a hi but some ignored me completely! What was wrong with people. I don't understand. If you put that you want to do meetups and playdates then not respond I just don't know what you're looking for? Are people judging babies on looks like regular tinder? On the age of the mums? Do I change my profile picture? Do I go Pinterest and have a perfectly set out photoshoot with my baby hating life sat inside a pumpkin of some sort to draw these women in? Do I need to do the weekly photoshoots showing my baby at every single week of her life? 

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It's not really helped my anxiety to be honest. I met my husband on a dating site and felt it much easier to meet a man, marry him and have two kids than it has been to find a baby date. 

If anyone reading this is in the West Yorkshire area who actually wants a baby playdate, please come forward. Married female seeks other females for mutual baby agreement, must have GSOH, no strings attached.


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Written by

Abigail Stanley

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Hi mums, I'm Abbey and I am 26. I am currently on maternity leave after having my second child. I'm very straight talking and have a lot of varied experiences parenting two children. I'm here to tell you the myth about if you have a bad birth your baby will be a good baby is just a myth, both of mine were bad! But there is light at the end of the tunnel, my little boy can finally express how he is feeling through words and actions and most of those words are muffled through his bedroom door he's just slammed in my face, so it's all good.

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